The Healing Power of Coaching:
A couple years ago, in discussing my work with my husband, he casually offered this reflection. He said to me: “You’re a healer.”
At the time, I could not hear that. In fact, I fought against it. I argued. I said- I’m NOT a psychologist, therapist, spiritual advisor, psychiatrist, counselor…. and on and on.
I remember that conversation well because I’ve changed my mind. Coaches are healers. And coaching is a form of healing.
Are you familiar with Martin Seligman’s work? And, in particular, his work on learned helplessness? Essentially, learned helplessness theory is the view that clinical depression and related mental illnesses may result from a real or perceived absence of control over the outcome of a situation.
In layman’s terms, when we think, based on our experiences in life, we do not have control or agency, the powerlessness we feel takes a significant toll.
Enter coaching. Coaching- at its core- restores agency and power.
Coaching heals by replacing victim mentality with a mentality of responsibility and ownership.
Coaching heals by holding people to their greatness and having them tap into newly discovered or re-discovered wells of potential and power.
Coaching heals by reminding people that even in the most challenging of circumstances, they have choices, opportunities, and possibilities.
Coaching heals by providing a sacred and intimate space for people to be seen and heard.
Coaching heals by offering the possibility of a life that is designed from a place of commitment and desire, rather than obligation, rules, shoulds, or someone else’s prescription.
Coaching heals by offering a partnership model unlike any other on the planet – true equals without judgment or power dynamic.
Coaching heals by modeling what trust and togetherness can look like that lifts us out of isolation and into deep connection
Coaching heals by reminding people of who the F*$% they are.
My coach is supporting me right now on working through what feels like a significant loss in my life. My default is to “figure it out” or to try to “make sense” of it. That’s not where the answer is.
He is calling me into a new conversation:
- What is the meaning of this?
- How is this experience FOR me?
- What am I supposed to learn?
- What is this teaching me?
